Yes, Virginia, That is Lawn Furniture in the Living Room

The Partnerin and I have a number of Code Phrases to abbreviate and lend some obscurity to the key messages we pass to one another every day. "Number One," for example, is a discreet way of saying "I love you."

I've added another one to the list ... "Number Three" means, "You were right, Honey." The sofa that I ordered delivered, with all due confidence in German efficiency despite several years of experience to the contrary, went missing, despite the fact that the store assured us it was in stock. In fact, on delivery day, one person phoned me to tell me it was on its way, while another phoned the Partnerin to tell her it was missing. Now that is the hallmark of German efficiency!

I was ready to take these bozos to court since they had clearly breached the contract, including several representations in writing that the sofa was in stock and deliverable on a given date. I think the bozos simply sold our sofa to the next people who would take delivery immediately so they wouldn't have to store it for two weeks, figuring they could tell us to pound sand for 8 weeks, which is essentially what they told us to do. I wanted blood, or at least two days of lost wages for the time it would take to resolve this. The Partnerin simply wanted out of the contract so we could go find another sofa from another store. Only time (eight weeks) will tell if that was a correct way forward. Germans don't believe in inventory.

They also don't trust in their fellow countrymen to deliver the goods on time, which is why they frequently do things we Americans would find counterproductive, like pre-positioning goods for further delivery. The countertop the Partnerin had pre-delivered arrived safely in the new flat with the rest of our goods and was duly installed. Here you see it being worked around as the kitchen is installed. The kitchen looks pretty good for a combination of old and new, and as soon as it is cleared of boxes, etc. I might post an "after" picture of it. In the meantime, you'll have to imagine something a little tidier, since I can't find either of my cameras these days. Glad I offloaded these to the laptop while the boxes were still coming in.

In the meantime, the London-sofa has found good use here, and yes, that old college standby of lawn furniture has been put into effect. Now, if I could only find that pink flamingo!