Link to Profile Semperoper, Dresden Sieg (auf dem Siegesäule), Berlin Brandenburg Tor, Berlin Skyline, Frankfurt am Main

Friday, April 28, 2006

To Live and Die in Frankfurt

I wonder why we waste our lives here
When we could run away to Paradise,
But I am held in some invisible vise,
And I can't get away.
To live and die in LA.
- Wang Chung,"To Live & Die in LA", 1985

The Partnerin came home from work last night after midnight. She started yesterday at 7 a.m., and she started today at 7 a.m. She is a better man than me. She may or may not hate her job, but she's not about to quit it without knowing what's over the horizon.

I wondered why I had Wang Chung on the MP3 player. This was the soundtrack to a somewhat cynical movie from the '80s. I didn't like the movie at the time. It was really out of place for the go-go Reagan years. The soundtrack was a gift from one of my Air Force buddies, who was slowly sinking into the abyss of depression that would end his career. He really connected with the film and its "everything, everybody is bogus" undertone.

Don't get me wrong, the sountrack is solid - the film would have been lost without it. But why is it on my MP3 player now?

My old boss, who retired and thus narrowed my own career choices here, told me he didn't think I was the type who could simply sit around. He was right. I seem to find plenty of things to do. I've certainly let blogging take a bit of my day lately. I finally got serious about learning German after having lived here for several years. I've baked a lot of bread. And I've finally gotten around to really seeing a lot more of Europe, which is why I took the gig here in the first place.

I don't know if I really miss working. I think I might miss some of the validation that comes from having a career and being regarded as a serious and competent professional, a subject matter expert. I might miss contributing to something larger. I might even miss the paycheck.

The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference. I've always loved working, but now I'm not even sure I miss the money. Cause for worry?

I apologized to the Partnerin last night for taking another call from a recruiter in London, for not finding something in Germany. Then she told me to not get too mad at her for pointing out that I have had more good prospects in the past six months than some people get in a lifetime and that I should be grateful for that. How could I ever get mad at her for that?

The sun is shining today. Time to put some new music on the MP3 player and go take a bike ride.


Blogger Haddock said...

I like the movie 'To live in die in LA', but I love the soundtrack, espscially the instrumental tracks. I have it on CD and I find it really good to drive to. It kicks butt :)
Personally I am not a career man. I see a job as purely a way of financing my free time, but I certainly understand that a career is very important for a lot of people :)

3:27 PM, April 29, 2006  

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