Der Auslander: October 2009

Monday, October 05, 2009

Peenemunde

Dislaimer: The Der Auslander website contains links to third-party websites on the Internet. Der Auslander provides these links to these websites only as a convenience to users of the website. Links on the Der Auslander website are not endorsements by Der Auslander, implied or express, of the linked sites or any products, services or links in such sites; and no information in such sites has been endorsed or approved by Der Auslander. Linked sites are not under the control of Der Auslander, and we are not responsible for the contents of any linked site or any link contained in a linked site. No information contained in the Der Auslander website or accessed through any linked site, or any link contained in a linked site, constitutes a recommendation by Der Auslander to buy, sell or hold any security, financial product or instrument. Information accessed through linked sites is not, nor should be construed as, an offer or a solicitation of an offer, to buy or sell securities by Der Auslander. Der Auslander does not offer or provide any investment advice or opinion regarding the nature, potential, value, suitability or profitability of any particular security, portfolio of securities, transaction or investment strategy, and any investment decisions you make will be based solely on your evaluation of your financial circumstances, investment objectives, risk tolerance, and liquidity needs. Any securities or investment ideas mentioned above are being used for illustrative purposes only and should not be regarded as an offer to sell or as a solicitation of an offer to buy. Past performance is no guarantee of future results. Any opinions expressed above are those of Der Auslander unless otherwise disclaimed or discredited. Der Auslander reserves the right to change his mind. You should always endeavor to formulate your own well-reasoned opinions, but you should be open to new ideas and respect the opinions of others. Brush your teeth at least twice a day, and look both ways before you cross the street.

Always read the Tiny Print!

1)Prizes must be claimed in Person by the winner at the specified merchant or vendor within 30 days of the date of award. No prizes will be mailed. Contest winners must wait at least 3 days after winning and must show identification to claim the prize.

2) Offer void where prohibited. Offer not valid for residents of New York City for reasons we hope are obvious.

3) Prize winners must wait 4 weeks after winning before being again eligible win on Der Auslander. Winners of major prizes, valued at $50 or more, must wait 4 months to win again. Persons deceiving Der Auslander in any way forfeit winnings.

4) Der Auslander reserves the right to limit each household to one qualifier per contest and make prize substitutions when necessary. Der Auslander management reserves the right to amend all contest rules at any time.

5) Der Auslander is not responsible if a reader/viewer is unable to get through via the internet for a contest due to equipment malfunction, busy lines, jihad, armageddon, or otherwise.

6) You must be 21 years of age or older to participate in a contest. We do this because school kids, learning ostensibly fresh in heads, have a better chance of winning, although the most likely reason is their hacker friend down the street.

7) Employees and immediate family members of Der Auslander employees, employees of affiliated media organizations, and employees of contest-prize merchants or vendors are not eligible to win even if they are merely unwitting participants (Sorry, Rupert!).

8) Further Contest Rules and rules for specific contests are in effect, but you won't find them here. Don't even bother looking.

9) Always read the Tiny Print!

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